The days are ever the same, though no two of them are alike, and they grow long: Under grey skies we approach Ash Wednesday, when we will be marked with a cross of dust and ashes. Waiting patiently for spring, for Pesach or for the birth of a child is hard and wearisome at times. Yesterday I felt depleted of all energy and the season of Lent showed up before me like something insurmountable. How many more days until my cousin‘s child is born? And how many more weeks until the trees turn green, flowers come forth and the sun warms our faces gently? And how tough will the season of fasting, praying and almsgiving turn out? How many battles lie ahead?

In his homily on Sunday, one of the priests at the parish where I attend Holy Mass reminded us of the virtue of fortitude as an especially necessary virtue during the upcoming weeks. Fortitude is holding fast to what is true and good in the face of all things adversarial. He said, we face four forces opposing us in Lent – and always: spiritual torpidness, die-hard bad habits, temptations and attacks by the devil, and our fear of men.

Let us not forget that Lent is necessary and good as a preparation for Pesach – that a lot of graces are hidden in a season of simple soup with bread and of increased meditation on the cross Christ bore for us. It is a time that shall help us examine our hearts more closely, shall help us amend our ways and grow in virtue – and most of all shall make us aware of our need for God‘s grace in all things. Our weak souls are trained just like muscles are: by overcoming resistance; and our wounded and weary souls are healed and refreshed by the grace that is new every morning.

I am almost done reading Saint Francis de Sales‘ Philothea or An Introduction to the Devout Life. Today, let us consider some of his counsels on things that already now might be relevant for us or might become relevant during the next few weeks: What about spiritual dryness? What about sadness? And why does the good and gentle bishop of Geneva give us the advice to be gentle towards ourselves?

On spiritual dryness and barrenness

Lent is a time in the wilderness, a retreat to the desert. Maybe we will receive great consolations there in the desert because our wayward hearts need them.

“Therefore, behold I will allure her, and will lead her into the wilderness: and I will speak to her heart. And I will give her vinedressers out of the same place, and the valley of Achor for an opening of hope: and she shall sing there according to the days of her youth, and according to the days of her coming up out of the land of Egypt.“

Hosea 2: 14-15

Or maybe we will go through dry and barren days because they are at this point in time a part better and more wholesome for us than consolations. If so, what shall we do?

“(…) amidst all our dryness and barrenness, let us be of good courage, and waiting patiently for the return of consolations, let us go on our way. Let us omit no devotional exercise, but rather, if possible, increase our good works; and if we cannot bring fresh fruits to our Beloved, let us at least offer those that are dry; for to Him all are the same, so long as they are offered by a heart wholly resolved to love Him. When the spring is fine, the bees abound more in honey than in young, for they devote themselves rather to gathering honey than to the propagation of their race, but if the spring be cloudy and cold, they increase their young the more, not being able to go forth in search of honey. Thus frequently the soul finds itself in the bright springtime of spiritual consolations, and in her eagerness to enjoy and amass them she slackens in the performance of good works; whilst, on the contrary, in proportion as she finds herself deprived of the pleasures of devotion, so much does she multiply her good works, and abounds in the inward increase of virtue, patience, humility, self-renunciation, resignation, and self-abnegation.
It is then a great mistake, and one to which women are especially liable, to imagine that a tasteless, emotionless, cold service is less acceptable to God; since our actions are like the rose, which is more pleasant when it is fresh, but has a more powerful scent when it is dry. So although those works which we perform with a kindled heart are more agreeable to us, who consider only our own gratification, yet, if they are performed amidst drought and barrenness, they are more costly and fragrant unto God. And that because in seasons of dryness our will makes us serve God as it were by main force, and consequently our service is more vigorous and faithful than in a milder season. There is little merit in serving a prince amidst the pleasures of peace and the delights of a court; but to serve him amidst the hardships of war, amidst trials and persecutions, that is a true sign of faithfulness and constancy.“

Saint Francis de Sales, Philothea or An Introduction to the Devout Life, TAN Classics, p. 287-288

On sadness

“For the sorrow that is according to God worketh penance, steadfast unto salvation; but the sorrow of the world worketh death.“

2 Corinthians 7: 10

There are two kinds of sorrow and sadness then: one is fruitful, and one is deadly. Of the latter, Saint Francis de Sales tells us that,

“Satan delights in sadness and melancholy since he himself is sad and melancholy, and will be so to all eternity, a condition which he would have all to share with him. Unholy sorrow disturbs the soul, disquiets her, arouses vain fears, disgusts her with prayer, overpowers the brain and makes it drowsy, deprives the soul of wisdom, resolution, judgment, and courage, and crushes her strength: in short, it resembles a hard winter, which withers the beauty of the earth and numbs all life, for it deprives the soul of all suppleness, rendering all her faculties of no avail and powerless.“

Saint Francis de Sales, Philothea or An Introduction to the Devout Life, TAN Classics, p. 274

Therefore we can think of this kind of discouraged sadness, which at times might be partly caused by the experience of disappointments and simply by something like mental, emotional or even bodily exhaustion, as an occasion for our adversary to tempt us into losing ourselves in this sadness, so that the last small spiritual fervor inside us may be smothered.

What remedies are there if we find ourselves affected by this sadness?

“Is any of you sad? Let him pray.“

James 5: 13

“Prayer is a sovereign remedy, for it raises the soul to God, who is our only joy and consolation; but in prayer let your emotions and words, whether inward or outward, conduce to trust and love of God; such as, O God of pity, Merciful and Good God, Loving Saviour, God of my heart, my Joy, my Hope, my Beloved Spouse, Beloved of my soul, and such as these. Vigorously check the inclination to sadness, and although you seem to do everything coldly, sadly, and without fervor, go on all the same; for the enemy would fain enfeeble our good works by sadness, and when he finds that we will not discontinue them, and that they are but the more meritorious through resistance, he will cease to annoy us.
Refresh yourself with spiritual songs, which have often caused the tempter to cease his wiles; as in the case of Saul, whose evil spirit departed from him when David played upon his harp before the king. (1 Kings 16: 23). It is also useful to be actively employed, and that with as much variety as may be, so as to divert the mind from the cause of its sadness, and to purify and enliven the mind, for sadness is a cold, withering passion. Also make use of outward acts of fervor, even though you have no delight in them; such as embracing the crucifix, pressing it to your heart (…). (…) The discipline in moderation is useful in overcoming sadness, because this voluntary external affliction produces internal consolation; and the soul experiencing outward pain is distracted from that which is within; frequent Communion is an excellent remedy, for that heavenly Food strengthens the heart and gladdens the spirit.“

Saint Francis de Sales, Philothea or An Introduction to the Devout Life, TAN Classics, p. 275-276

Gentleness towards ourselves

“Believe me, that as the remonstrances of a father will have much greater effect upon his child if they are offered kindly and gently than if they are hot and angry; so when we have erred, if we reprove our heart gently and calmly, rather pitying than reproaching it, and encouraging it to amendment, its repentance will be much deeper and sounder than if we were angry, stormy, and irritable.“

Saint Francis de Sales, Philothea or An Introduction to the Devout Life, TAN Classics, p. 149

Saint Francis de Sales reminds us that our “indignation and vexation and irritation with ourselves“ when discovering that we committed faults “tends to foster pride and springs entirely from self-love, which is displeased at finding that we are not perfect“ (p. 148).

“We should endeavor then to look upon our faults with a calm, collected, firm displeasure. A judge who passes sentence thoughtfully and calmly, punishes vice more effectually than if he is impetuous and hasty, for in the latter case, he does not punish so much according to the crime committed, as according to his own feeling; and so we correct ourselves more effectually by a quiet persevering repentance than by an irritated, hasty, passionate repentance; for such as these are not according to the magnitude of our faults, but according to our impulse. (…)
Therefore when your heart has fallen raise it gently, humbling yourself greatly before God, and acknowledging your fault, but without marveling at your fall; since it is no marvel that infirmity should be infirm, weakness weak, and frailty frail. But nevertheless heartily detest the offense of which you have been guilty in God‘s sight, and with hearty courage and confidence in His mercy, begin once more to seek that virtue from which you have fallen away.“

Saint Francis de Sales, Philothea or An Introduction to the Devout Life, TAN Classics, p. 148-150

Saint Francis de Sales, pray for us!

By Judit